Flee lange!

Do not read this at work because it’s dead funny: “I don’t know about you, but now that I know that the eggs I eat for breakfast every morning might possibly be laid by a bald chicken, a rather bald chicken, waking up is going to be a hundred percent more awesome.” — Dooce

My new favourite bible verse, although I haven’t had one before

From Church Hopping:

And Ehud reached with his left hand, took the sword from his right thigh, and thrust it into his belly. And the hilt also went in after the blade, and the fat closed over the blade, for he did not pull the sword out of his belly; and the dung came out.

Comments: Apparently the sword pierced all the way through and something unexpected came out the other side. The author felt this was a necessary detail to include.

Another good laugh, via Newsvine.

Like a microcosm, but more about how many ways something can piss me off in as short a time possible

Honestly.

It’s not even the end of the week yet, and so far I’ve experienced:

  • running for the train
  • train cancellations
  • my train being late so I’ve missed my connection

In Singapore, if you miss your train it’s not a major deal, another one will come along in under ten minutes. Here, if you miss your train you’re kinda fucked. I can’t ever work late, because if I miss the 18:15 train, the next one is at 20:15.

This morning my train to Glasgow was late, so I arrived just as my connection was about to leave. I ran to try and get it, along with two or three other hapless commuters, but alas, it was not to be, as the train doors closed practically in our faces and I faced the prospect of being late for work in my first week. And then my phone battery was low so I couldn’t call the offce to let them know I’d be half an hour late. And then when I finally got off the later train it started raining, and immediately after I got my umbrella out the wind started blowing.

I think the second-hand car sales industry is hexing me.

To take your mind off my whining, now for something completely different — animated porn (sadly, it’s SFW because it’s only an observation).

Hiccough

I had to open my big mouth (type my big keyboard?). My train was cancelled yesterday, and that meant I had to go and grab a bus that wasn’t on my prepaid ZoneCard, and it dropped me off somewhat closer to home, but not close enough. There are no buses. Which meant Neil had to get help from someone to pick me up because he couldn’t book a taxi.

Again, I cried

Oh my

This kitty looks remarkably like someone on this house who puts their hand up to their mouth whenever they watch teevee. Another gem of a link received from my sister.