A link from Terry, who says: “Good for procrastinating for a couple of minutes.” — The Kitten Cannon.

“I’d really love to help you guys paint, since you helped me decorate my room [ed: months ago, with not one finger lifted to help since then]… I’ve got work to do for this promotion board… [insert information about promotion opportunities here]… I’ll be doing this all afternoon.”

I walk into the living room soon after to find her hard at work, learning the intricate plot details of Serenity that will surely score points at the promotion board (comprehension of science fiction principles — an important skill in the civil service). A couple of hours later, Neil walks into the living room to find her hard at work, studying the insides of her eyelids.

It’s almost Christmas.

Firstly, I received my copy of The Amazing Adventures of Dietgirl — Shauna’s lard-busting memoir. She said (over a text), Don’t tell me if you hate it because I’ll cry. Shauna, the introduction made me want to cry. I’ve read till right before you leave Oz for the UK, and loving it so far. There’s something even more intimate about reading her memoir, which is based on her diet blog, than reading her blog(s) on their own. Weird, I know.

The Christmas holiday has so far been about painting. We painted the walls in the bedroom today. We still need to prep one wall (the plaster ain’t quite dry yet) for wallpapering, paint the ceiling, paint the cornice (Neil has just patched the bits that needed patched), and finally, paint the skirting and door (that actually needs to be replaced due to non-closing warpiness, but we have our priorities and door stoppers are cheap to buy).

I could just say that I’ve been really busy with work (I have been — this fortnight’s break is a godsend, but I’m shitting myself thinking of how much I need to do when I go back into the office), but the truth is I’m not as, er, candid about things going on in my life right now. I’ve been considering setting up an anonymous blog and using an atrocious template just so I can vent, but I’ve decided that’s not a good idea (writing style possibly too distinctive in the *cough* freestyle use of the English language *cough*).

a cloud in my mindBasically, this last year has really tested my patience (my patience failed about a month ago). I have recently discovered that I am similar to my father in that once I have decided that I don’t like someone, it’s pretty fucking hard to change that opinion. That doesn’t really bother me, since I live by the saying Behaviour reflects personality. I do not appreciate someone making stuff up about me in order to accuse me of something I haven’t done just so they can win an argument or score an imaginary point.

It’s mostly my fault that I haven’t been exercising in several months. It’s my fault that I live too far from work and I can’t afford the time to go to the gym after dinner, because by the time I’ve finished eating it’s time for a shower and bed. Neil plans (his plans don’t get very far, I’m going to nag ‘im about this) to join his Uni gym as an alumni member, which means I can join a gym near the office and our workout / shower / bus home / dinner can coincide.

My general malaise has made me pretty fucking dull. One major thing I need to do is start doing stuff again. I’m scared of looking for too many things, too many choices causing decision paralysis and all that.

Life isn’t bad but it’s overwhelmingly frustrating.

The Internet! Social networking! A perfect place for hoaxes to flourish. People, check the sob stories!

Every time I receive one of these mass emails asking me to be outraged and sign an email petition, the very first thing I do is search online for confirmation of its status as a hoax — I find that to be the result 100% of the time. Why do people keep falling for this?!

Gah!

I have no idea why I find this funny. Got fleas? Get the vacuum:

They said a standard vacuum cleaner abuses the fleas so much it kills 96 percent of adult fleas and 100 percent of younger fleas.

(Emphasis mine.)

It boggles the mind. I think I must be imagining bruised and battered fleas in a household setting, making excuses about falling down the stairs.

  • watched Have I Got News For You and Jonathon Woss
  • watched half of Barton Fink (before I got too tired)
  • picked Neil up after his office Christmas night out (the day after!)
  • had ‘tea’ (as in the meal between lunch and dinner) at Frankie & Benny’s
  • watched a bunch of bad/silly/rerun crime drama
  • did the weekly shop at Asda
  • bought a load of Christmas presents (finally convinced Neil that working in the city centre — as he does — does not make him more likely to buy Christmas presents on time)
  • checked out furniture and white goods at some trading estate near Uddingston (thrilling)
  • cried a bit at the end of Cranford (the BBC is heartbreakingly good at period drama based on novels)
  • cried at the end of Once Upon a Time in England (this book is as excellent as The Poison That Fascinates, but in a wholly different way; put both of these on pre-order now!)

Presenting pensionbook — the social network all the oldies are talking about.

Alerted by a colleague!

Ingredients

Halved shallots, 4
Chicken stock, 700ml
Sliced lemongrass, 2-3 stalks
Sliced galangal, 6 slices
Sliced chicken, whatever works for you
Chilli paste, 1 tsp (we used chilli oil)
Fish sauce, 1 tbsp
Mushrooms, 1 can (we used straw)
Juice of 1 lime (depends on how sour you like it)

Method

  1. Fry off the shallots in a saucepan until they start to go soft.
  2. Pour in the chicken stock, cover, and bring to the boil.
  3. Add the lemongrass and galangal.
  4. Add the chicken (you can also add prawns, but Neil doens’t eat them.)
  5. Make up a mixture of the chilli paste (oil) and fish sauce. Add that to the saucepan of soup.
  6. Add the mushrooms, followed by the lime juice.
  7. Once the chicken is cooked, turn off the heat.
  8. Serve it with rice (we did) or noodles.

I got the recipe off Sify, but adapted it as we didn’t need it to be so salty. And it was excellent! Neil had to add more chilli oil, but I thought it was perfect.

Total prep and cooking time on this was 30 minutes!

One of the reasons I love Neil. He’s funny as.

  • started reading a novel (manuscript) that we were told (on Friday) that we should have read by Monday
  • watched Have I Got News For You, The Armstrong and Miller Show, and Friday Night with Jonathon Woss
  • watched Saturday Kitchen (mmm, food)
  • finished reading the novel (manuscript) — I rock! I read so fast!
  • did some work on crafty Christmas presents
  • had dinner at Ravellos
  • sat and watched Casualty while Neil tried to decide if he was feeling well enough to go out
  • went out for a few drinks
  • woke early to go shopping in Glasgow (!) for more of my Christmas present
  • did the weekly food shop at Morrisons (not Asda! Wow!)
  • wrapped presents
  • finished crafting the first batch of crafty Christmas presents
  • watched Cranford

How could I not love this voice? *swoon*

Is this obviously faked? Yes. Is it funny anyway? Hell yeah.

ainsley harriot's sausages joke label

No idea of the source, it was sent in an email!

I have a problem with free prescriptions.

I have a serious problem with a (minority) government trying to create a Socialist/Communist society and pushing for a successful Capitalist economy at the same time. It just can’t work.

Are they gonna start talking about a ‘democracy with Scottish characteristics’ next?

Via Terry, what food for a week looks like around the world.

I’d be tempted to say the Mexicans drink too much Coke, but my cousin buys cartons of the stuff. Note, also, how the food looks fresher and healthier the less each family spends!

Ingredients

Light coconut milk, 1 can
Sliced galangal, thumb-sized piece that’s been sliced
Sliced lemongrass, 2 small stalks
Halved shallots, 6
Garlic, 1 clove
Kaffir lime leaves, 3, torn
Sliced chicken breast, whatever works for you
Split bird’s eye chillies, 2 (those small hot ones)
Fish sauce, 3 tbsp
Lime juice, a good squeeze (I think)

I kind of followed this recipe from ThaiFoodPlus, but Neil and I agreed on some modifications (and acknowledge where we’ve fumbled!)

Method

  1. Bring the coconut milk to the boil.
  2. Throw in the galangal, lemongrass, shallots, garlic, and kaffir lime leaves (we didn’t have any kaffir lime leaves, unfortunately).
  3. Bring it back up to a slow boil, then add the chicken and let it simmer.
  4. Once the chicken has been cooked in the simmering coconut broth, throw in the chillies, fish sauce, and lime juice (we didn’t have any limes either).
  5. Give it a stir and take it off the heat.
  6. Serve it over rice or noodles.

This is the first time I’ve had a part in cooking something from scratch and it tasted good. And it only took 15 minutes, including prep time. W00t!

Total prep and cooking time on this was 20 minutes!

  • shared a bottle of wine and watched Jonathon Woss on the telly
  • looked at a very overpriced flat in Glasgow (out of curiosity)
  • did some crocheting (still a bit more to go before that lot of Christmas presents go out)
  • went to B&Q (so Neil could order more insulation)
  • watched Clockers and shared a bottle of wine
  • did the weekly shop at Asda (also got part of my Christmas present from Neil)
  • hung out with my cousin’s family, had dinner (partly home-cooked, partly from China Blue)
  • forgot that Cranford was on until Neil’s mother mentioned it (only missed the first quarter!)