Dear Terry, Yes, it has taken me this long to post your Beautiful art made with knitting website tip. My favourite is the bunny impaled with a carrot. It rocks very hard.
Behold the face of defeat
Ahem. This will probably be the only time Gary (as captured by Neil) will be featured in so many pixels, but maximising his pain is my God-given duty.
Living and working abroad
Caroline Miceli! I know you! I remember you when you were working in Xiamen.
I don’t know about the numbers of young Americans moving overseas temporarily on a ‘gap year’ type of career move, and it’s interesting that it’s one of the most popular e-mailed articles on the New York Times website today. Lots of people come to Xiamen (and probably other parts of China) to, IMHO:
- take a holiday and earn a bit of money (illegally) while they’re at it
- do whatever it is their company sent them here to do
- earn a fortune being an entrepreneur in ‘trading’
As you can imagine, those doing option 3 tend to be disappointed. One of the things that gets me about people who come here seeking their fortune is that they don’t seem to realise that EVERYONE IS DOING IT. And those who have done very well for themselves have put in YEARS AND YEARS of hard work and experience building.
I am certainly not the only gay in the village who understands this, but why is it so many foreigners here have this expectation of big money in a short time? Chinese people aren’t going to fall over themselves to buy your product or make your product irresistable to sales channels you might or might not have. If you’ve spotted a good product, there’s a good chance a VERY LARGE CORPORATION in the developed world with LOTS OF MONEY AND MIGHT has already had their sourcing agents go in there with promises of HUGE VOLUMES to get low prices, so you’re not going to get the ‘best price’, no matter what the factory says.
I don’t know when this became a rant but I’m going to stop it. I came to China with no plan, having been told that if I wanted to teach English as a stop gap I was going to find it difficult to find work since I’m ethnic Chinese. One thing I certainly did not expect was to end up doing what I’m doing now. I also did not expect to still be in China.
What I think is the most striking thing — nothing happens as you expect or even remotely anticipate. Come to China for a holiday, find yourself still there three years later teaching English. Or something. Meet a girl, she gets pregnant, suddenly you’ve got a family. Life just surprises you. It changes you (me) in such subtle ways that when you (I) emerge at the end of the experience, you (I) am quite, quite different.
Frickin’ hot wash
That scarf I was so pleased with? That brightly-coloured, fluffy, soft wool and mohair job? It went in the washing machine for a warm wash, but the thermostat is clearly broken like my spirit and will to achieve, and it SHRUNK and partially FELTED. Which means it’s not fluffy, it’s not so bright, and has great big holes where there used to be acceptable medium holes.
Plus I have deadlines and it’s rainy and kind of cold and we’ve been back in Xiamen for less than three weeks and I already wish I was on vacation. I’ve only had one freelancer submit a story this issue and it turns out she lives in the building across from mine (how weird) and so I’ve had to write like crazy, despite dealing with a whole lot of (grammatically correct and coherent) writer’s block.
And my mind is tired. I’m so tired. Curling up in bed and subsisting off pot noodles and cup a soup looks bloody irresistable right about now. And I can crochet more scarf-y things because I bought more fancy yarn, which is the only bright spot in my creative life. And that’s only because one of the rolls is bright red. The other one Neil describes as “muted”.
I’m not cute and happy and I have nothing funny to write about except maybe that the Sofitel in Xiamen has rooms with dirty old man written all over them because the wall separating the bedroom and bathroom is clear glass so if some bloke hires a working girl he can watch her in the bath. But it could also be so that when you’re in the bath, you can turn the telly around and watch National Geographic. Which had a programme on about the marsupial lion and this giant scary pelican-looking bird the Aussie paleontologist called THUNDER BIRD, which makes me expect it to put on a helmet and fly through space to save the world. Giant demon duck of doom is much better — I see a crochet toy bearing that name.
Rambling helps me relax.
This weekend I…
… watched Scotland battle their way to victory against England in the rugby.
EIGHTEEN – TWELVE, BABY! It was beautiful to watch Chris Paterson kick all those penalties (too bad it wasn’t a try scoring match, I like those better).
Last night we watched Terry Gilliam’s The Brothers Grimm.
All in all a very relaxing weekend. Except for the excitement of SCOTLAND BEATING ENGLAND.
Ferrets in drag
If drag means dressing up like a rabbit. I wonder if Toad the ferret gets confused.
Naughty, very naughty
What happens when I try to make a skull but decide it’s rabbit partway through?
There’s a guy in the place
He’s got a bittersweet face
And he goes by the name of Ebeneezer Goode
His friends call him Eezer and he is the main geezer
And he’ll vibe about the place like no other man could
He’s refined, he’s sublime, he makes you feel fine
Though very much maligned and misunderstood
But if you know Eezer he’s a real crowd pleaser
He’s ever so good, he’s Ebeneezer Goode
Shamen, Ebeneezer Goode
‘E’s the main geezer, awright!
You’ll find me under the layer of conversation
There was a time when I would itch to go out, to party, to meet new people. I think I was sociable because I wanted to be. Making conversation and getting to know people on that initial, superficial basis has always been a tough, awkward thing. It might be obvious to those whom (note to Keith: this would be an instance that someone uses the word ‘whom’) I chat with that I’m struggling.
Time has marched on. Making conversation continues to be hard. I remember myself trying with a young student on gap year, chatting with her about her efforts to study Chinese. I wonder if she thought I was younger than I am because of my evident discomfort with social discourse, an unavoidable necessity at parties.
Making conversation with her, in fact, was an aberration. I have withdrawn into myself by astounding depths (I didn’t realise there was so much of me to turn inside out). Not bothering to chat and discomfiting people away from me is my modus operandi. Some people (well, two people) in my life seem to embrace this anti-social quality, and they have problem sitting or standing with me in silence (or leaving me alone), as I (we) survey the scene.
I suppose it’s true that I look unsociable, I don’t fit in with the flow. I’m tempted to say I never have and I don’t want to and give that rebellious, aggressive reaction. The truth is I have, all my short life I have, and actually being in a place like Xiamen (or maybe I’ve grown as a person?) has encouraged me to drop trying to give the impression of being a more colourful personality than I am. If you have the patience to let me get over my instinctive shyness, if you call me and ask me to hang out and really get to know me, in time you’ll find that I can be a real talker. I’ll even call and ask you to hang out.